Master Your Emotional Triggers
April 24, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Emotional triggers can happen just like that! One minute you’re feeling great, the next you’re down in the dumps. Have you ever experienced this? You read something, have a conversation with someone, see a colleague who’s doing something that you wish you were, see a couple laughing or a woman dressed really nicely, and all of a sudden your energy and joy decreases.
You may not even realize you’ve been triggered. But you know you feel off and out of alignment. Perhaps you become anxious, jealous, fearful or simply shut down.
It is really not about the other person, what you read or what you saw. Triggers take you back to an unpleasant event in your past, which is what stirs up the unpleasant feelings. However, being triggered is a great opportunity to heal, learn, grow and fully become more YOU.
One negative emotional trigger can lead you down a painful path to feeling powerless if you don’t know what’s going on. That’s why it’s so important to become fully aware of the things that trigger you.
Negative triggers can have the following manifestations:
- Physical: You are depleted of energy, eat more junk food, and become sleepy.
- Emotional: You lack motivation and feel helpless, overwhelmed, angry, anxious or depressed.
- Mental: You are less aware; you procrastinate, and have repeated self-defeating thoughts.
- Spiritual: You have no connection to purpose, creativity or inspiration.
Everyone has emotional triggers. Here are some ways in which you can learn to master them.
- Make a List of Your Emotional Triggers
Understanding what your emotional triggers are raises your awareness so that you can create a plan for self-care, be well and not suffer when they arise. Also, it is important to recognize that when we are fatigued, we are much more susceptible to our negative emotional triggers. - Be Present to How You Feel.
Remind yourself that you’re being triggered because of a connection to a past event and detach from the old story. Release it. Decide to not give your power and energy away to someone or something that is not serving you. The only way to move on is to empower yourself to let go. When you’re empowered and in alignment, you feel energized, happy and great. Stay connected to how you feel throughout the day. - Get Out of Reactive Mode
You can learn a lot from emotional triggers – and growing from them takes you to a higher level in your life. Understanding our triggers teaches us valuable lessons about who we are and what brings us peace. From here, we get to create new options for ourselves rather than staying in reactive mode.
The next time you find that you are experiencing negative repercussions from a trigger, stop and realize that you have a choice in whether you react. If you know your buttons are being pushed, breathe and choose calm. Think, “What is the big lesson for me to learn here?” Asking questions like
- Do I want to react or grow?
- Is relinquishing my power to someone else in alignment with my desires?
- What do I know to be true today?
will help you move through the negativity and learn the lesson you are being taught by the experience. Learn to choose calm over chaos.
28 Ways to Rock Your Own World!
April 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career - Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15.Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
6 Tips to Rock Your Confidence
April 10, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
6 Tips to Rock Your Confidence
Part of being a confident, strong, successful woman is living from a place of calm and fully connecting to your inner rhythm. Doing away with drama, chaos, worry, self-criticism and such behaviors will allow you to instantly feel a sense of calm in your life.
Being free from everything that is not authentic to you will give you a sense of calm so you can get clear and take action on the things you’ve been secretly dreaming about.
1. Confident women have no interest in interpreting the actions of others (big energy zapper).
Let go of the need to worry, especially about what others think or meant when they did this or said that. Release the need to ruminate on what happened, what you did or didn’t say or what others did or didn’t do. Completely release worrying from your life and about what others think. Worry doesn’t bring happiness.
The truth of the matter is we have no idea of and we have no control over what others think. When we spend time interpreting the actions of others, it depletes us and distracts us from our life; these distractions usually leads to self-sabotaging behaviors. Let go today of the habit of interpreting others’ actions and put this energy into living out your desires and creating the most meaningful life.
Make a sacred commitment today to free yourself for good from analyzing the actions of others. Replace this energy with dreaming BIG – you will instantly feel better!
2. Confident women choose a life free from worry.
Worrying about the things from the past, future and things we can’t control, never provides a helpful solution or contributes productively to our goals and dreams. Worry is a big distraction, holding us back and keeping us from taking consciousness and meaningful action in our lives.
Make a list of all the things you worry about on a daily basis and replace this worry with something that positively and powerfully fills your soul instead. You will feel so much better and feel more alive.
3. Confident women enjoy every moment in life – even the difficult ones.
Confident women know how to savor every morsel of life. They believe themselves to be strong, resourceful and creative, even in when things become challenging. They know that through challenge, there is growth.
Allow your self to move in the flow of things and let go of resistance. This is key even when things are most challenging. Staying connected to your good flowing energy, even in the most challenging moments in life, means looking for positive and creative solutions. You must let go of critical or negative thoughts so you are able to find the perfect opportunity in the challenging moment.
4. Confident women feel connected to themselves, others and nature.
The more you love yourself and the more connected you feel to yourself and with others, the more you give and receive.
Spend time each day whether it’ s journaling, taking a walk in nature, meditating or drinking a cup of tea, in quiet and begin to connect with yourself again. Dig deep into your soul and connect with you dreams and desires. Get to know yourself well, so you can begin to create the life you want and share your best self with the people in your world.
5. A confident woman smiles with her mouth, heart and eyes.
Your eyes are the pathway to your heart and soul – smile with them. Really practice this right now go to the mirror and smile at yourself with your eyes. Smiling brings feel-good energy and is very contagious. Smiling is a reflection of inner happiness and is a gift you can share with the world wherever you are.
6. Confident women act spontaneously and are not paralyzed by fear.
Please don’t let fear from the past, or fear of what could happen, stop you from being authentic and real right now. The past is the past, and we all have things from the past we would rather forget. The future hasn’t happened so fearing what could happen really isn’t the best way to engage in your life. If you allow yourself to give your power to the past or the future, this will hold you back. Allow your self to learn and grow, so you move on from the past and live in the present.
Break Free Now From Clutter
February 28, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Are you ready for some new inspired energy and to step into a fresh start, new hope & possibilities? Last week I had clients tell me they were ready to clean up from the inside out meaning ready to conquer the piles of clutter they’ve been avoiding both physical & mental. Some clients simply were good to themselves guilt free and gave themselves, they invested in the thing they had been dreaming about or they decided to take up a new hobby. Other clients literally took much bigger steps in personal responsibility, deciding to stop making excuses, improve their financial well being and commit to more action for an extended period rather than on & off again.
Last week during my session with Ellen (I respect honor confidently therefore I will never use a clients real name) we discovered what her over filled closets really represented. The impact of over stuffed closets was symbolic of her relationship with HERSELF.
You see, the clutter in our lives is not there because we are lazy, don’t have time, are overwhelmed or unfocused that is all cover up – clutter is about a deeper issue. Tolerating clutter is a sure way to living a mediocre life.
When we want something bad enough we do whatever it takes to make it happen. I have personal experience with this one & I watch many of my clients take on this attitude. It works 100% full proof. To me it’s one of the boldest actions one can take.
When we chose to conquer the clutter in our life it frees us up to take action on the things that matter most to us. When we awaken to the real reason we are tolerating clutter in our physical space or mentally – we gain freedom to fly – higher than we can possibly imagine.
Here are 4 important questions to ask yourself so you can break free from clutter.
This week Empowerment Assignment: Grab your journal and answer these questions.
- Understand what you are getting out of the clutterThe only reason you have clutter is because it gives you something even if it’s not something good.You must be getting something out of that clutter, right?I asked my client Ellen this question last week. She said “what?” I then said, “Ellen we only tolerate things in our life because we get something out of it. Whether it’s good or bad so tell me what’s the pay off for your clutter.” At first she resisted the question and then really opened up to what the question had to offer her – Insight. In just a few moments her truth appeared.Ellen said in a very quiet voice ” What I get out of my clutter is I get to stay covered up in it and not be inactive in creating the life I want. I can continuously focus on the mess instead of facing my fears about moving forward.”Clutter was Ellen’s cover up for keeping it safe and staying small.Not moving towards her dreams and living her ideal life. If Ellen hides behind the clutter she wouldn’t upset anyone. Her fear is she may upset people if she actually left her job and started her own business. She was afraid to break out of the roles assigned to her.
Nice women are meant to break out of the assigned roles especially if they’re not happy in them, if it will better their life, people around them and the world.
She also realized she didn’t have to look her life in the eyes and get honest. Clutter allowed her to avoid the conversation she needed to have with herself, it created an illusion of keeping her safe from changing her career path and kept her at a safe enough distance from pursuing her dreams.
All Ellen got out of clutter was to focus on it and talk about instead of being BOLD and taking action to change her life.
- Who Would You be Without Your Clutter?Ellen told me she would be so happy she was honoring herself, she would stop feeling so bad for not honoring herself, she would be more bold and get her sexy back (she did say it). She would actually claim her voice and start her own business; she would enroll in the dance class she also wanted to, and she would actually want to be closer with husband.Write down who you’d be with out you clutter.Examples:Focused
On timeMore creative
HAPPY
Productive
Greater self-confidence.
More Energy
- Do you want to take action to be that person listed above? YESNO
- STOP Looking the Other way (YOU deserve this to be clutter free): Decide to commit to look at the clutter and learn. Take ACTION.Answer these questions:
- What needs cleaning up in your life and your closets?
- What are your options for actively making this happen?
- Can you do this alone or do you need support?
- Who could offer you the best support?
Examples: yourself, friend or a coach to give your support and accountability.
Make Your Plan to be Clutter Free this Spring
Make a list of what you need in place to clean your clutter out. Devise your plan of action & get support if you need. For most women we resist support (I know I used to be a pro at this). Open yourself to accomplish this with ease by allowing yourself to set up any support you may need. Outsource hire someone to remove the table you haven’t used in years, the broken exercise equipment that’s collecting dust, take the bag of cloths to Goodwill. Ask a friend to come over get iced lattes, make it fun and go to work. Than reward yourself perhaps with a pedicure. Next would be to decide what support you need to create your master life plan of getting clear and moving in the direction of living on purpose.
8 Tips to Feel Great and Have More Clarity
February 7, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
When you feel better – you do better. You actually create excellence for yourself that overflows into your relationship with your family, friends, clients, career and your community – which just makes the world a happier, healthier and wealthier place. (Plus, the results you create will skyrocket!!)
Read through them and start now this week and implement them into your life!
1. Wake up early: (End your relationship with the snooze button) – I know most people want more sleep, but if you read and practice my other tips below, you will have more energy to wake up earlier. When you wake up earlier, create a morning ritual for yourself and only do things for YOU during this time.
2. Create a Ritual & Go to Local Farmers: Obtain a list of local farmers and local Farmer’s Markets in your area – preferably the organic farms. Plan a day to visit and do your shopping for greens, vegetables, fresh herbs, and meats. Make it an adventure and try a different fruit, vegetable, or other product. I have created a Saturday morning ritual and part of it includes visiting my Local Farmer’s market after an amazing workout. It truly is a satisfying and fulfilling experience to nurture my body, mind, and spirit – but it is also great to celebrate the local farmers and all their dedication and hard work (they are the best entrepreneurs!)
3. Power Up with a Green Smoothie: Green smoothies are my FAVORITE! Explore the power of greens! Making green smoothies is fun and will add a glow to your skin and vibrancy to your step…not to mention the improved mental clarity and focus! I can tell you from my own personal experience that there is so much power in drinking Green Smoothies – it’s a sure way to get your juju back – and instantly!
4. Drink lots of clean, purified water: You will be amazed at the difference in the way you feel when you are well hydrated. I replenish my body with a gallon of clean water a day and will never go back to less than this, because of the huge difference in how I feel – and I am all about feeling good! I know a gallon may seem like a lot, so start off with a ½ gallon of clean water and work your way up. Allow yourself the experience of feeling true hydration. The benefits are so wonderful – glowing skin, no more sugar or salt cravings, detoxification, and much more energy.
5. Good Fats: Good fats keep your metabolism on fire…burning – and this is good for your brain! It helps you feel satisfied. Be sure to include good fats each day. To do this, try Udo’s oil, avocado, or raw cod liver oil. Nuts are also a great source of good fat, however trade in the processed nuts and eat raw only – you will notice you will not overeat them, your digestive system will digest them with ease, and the flavor of raw nuts is very robust.
6. Refined sugars and processed starches are the devil: dump them like a bad freaking habit. Give yourself five days to eliminate them completely and you are going to feel a huge difference in your body and a zest for life – guaranteed! When you do this, you will wake up ready for the day instead of hitting the snooze button. You’ll feel calm, and even begin to have more passion! Learn about the impact of refined sugar and processed foods on your health, acid/alkaline balance, and intestinal health. Add raw organic veggies, sprouts, green drinks, green smoothies, enzymes, vitamins, and minerals to your diet.
7. Move Your Gorgeous Body! This one tip alone will move you out of feeling stuck! Work up a sweat! You will release feel good endorphins and get your lymph system moving, which carries away the waste and toxins! Walk, Jump Rope, Yoga, Run, Trampoline, Bike Ride, take a dance class, or swim. Try something new – or reconnect to a form of exercise you once loved. Just do it!
8. Turn up the “Feel Good”! Find, and regularly commit to activities that help you feel good and renewed. Some ideas: meditation, gratitude journaling, guided relaxation or visualization CD’s, nature, bubble baths followed by lathering your skin in your favorite body lotion. The point is to renew, add more you time, and just de-stress. Often we hold more stress in our bodies than we realize.
To Your Bold, Brilliant & Rich Success!
4 Ways to FEEL AMAZING!
January 23, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
I will start this week out by saying you are so WORTHY of the effort it takes to feeling amazing so you can achieve your ULTIMATE DESIRES!
1. Get Your Sweet Self Up & Out of Bed:
Enough Already with the Snooze Button: The best thing about your life is that it is happening NOW! I often speak with women who are continuously hitting the snooze button. They lay in bed in dread, or just stay in bed – not wanting to get up. If this is you, please take my advice…it’s time to break up with your snooze button! Why? Nothing good comes from this habit. (A great thing about habits is that they can be broken with the right support!)
Yes, of course, sometimes we do need more rest, but that is not what I am talking about here, today. As women, we crave more time – more time in calm and peace. We desire more time to fall in love with ourselves, more time to nurture our souls and precious desires, and more time to make a plan toward our goals.
You see, one of my best secrets – ever – to living a vibrant, radiant, sexy, and happy life – is to wake up a little bit earlier and claim time for ME in the morning. While your family and loved ones are still sleeping, and the world is still quiet, can be the most beneficial time for your own well-being. There is an absolute sweetness that comes from creating a morning ritual – it is so powerful and soul transforming. This one step changes my private client’s lives in a really big way – words truly cannot express it. When we get clear about their morning and ditching the snooze button – magic happens for them! Magic, such as crystal clarity about your life, defining exciting personal and professional goals, and what’s next for you…These are all ways in which we connect to a higher level of focus that is absolutely necessary in the pursuit of your life’s new meaning and goals.
2. Express Your Truest Self:
Please make a new contract with yourself to fully express yourself. No more holding back, being submissive, and staying in hiding. The world needs your brilliance! It’s truly time to do away with the out-dated self-image of what you should and should not do. Instead, fully let go of the worry that you may hurt or upset others if you truly express yourself. Let’s face the real truth – the only one you upset and hurt is you, when you hold back on the self-expression. You have such brilliance inside of you – a true gift. When we liberate ourselves through self-expression, we liberate others to do the same.
True freedom comes in the form of self-expression, or the ways in which you can express yourself.
Here are some of my most favorite forms of self-expression:
- Through finding and using your voice more often.
- Writing and Journaling.
- Singing, Dancing, and Painting.
- Cooking and Gardening.
- Dressing yourself in a way that feels most authentic.
- Deepening intimacy with yourself and others
- Allowing yourself to receive love.
- Being vulnerable in a health way.
- Coming out of hiding.
- Connecting with more like-minded people.
- Expressing gratitude.
Add yours here______________________________________________________________
3. Claim What You Need and Want and Get the BEST Support
Women are often keeping up with the demands of life – instead of really claiming what it is we need and want, and getting the best support to help us fulfill wants and needs. If you are feeling frustrated, angry (or any other negative emotion) about someone, or something, chances are you have a need that is going unmet…so, it probably makes sense.
However, the truth is that knowing this, makes it your responsibility to take whatever action is necessary to get clear about your needs. It is up to you to determine what you need and to take action to get your needs met. I know at first it can be really uncomfortable to ask for what you need. But once you do it – and experience the freedom that comes from it – it will become easier to do. Someday, it just will be “how you roll”!
Remember, no one can take your personal power or happiness – unless you allow it. Take time today to get clear about what needs are going unmet in your life – and do not hesitate to invest in the best support to help with this, like hiring a coach. You deserve to have all your needs and goals met.
4. Eliminate Low Energy Foods:
If you want to feel amazing, you must eliminate low energy foods! When I coach private clients who have low energy foods in their daily food plan, they all have something in common – they have completely disconnected from their bodies and have forgotten how it feels to feel amazing in their own skin. You really deserve this in your life – to fuel your body with clean high-energy foods, to feel your absolute BEST, and be so incredibly comfortable in your own skin! Not only will you feel amazing, you will feel connected to your passion again, GSSD (get serious stuff done), feel sexy and vibrant, and you will be surprised how many opportunities come your way – effortlessly.
Do this today! Get clear about what you are eating and why you’re eating it. Then – answer this question: Is it helping you, or hurting you?
4 Tips to Keep Your Dreams Moving Forward
January 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
I know sometimes we just feel like giving up! It seems like we are not making progress as we had hoped for the New Year and often it feels like “making progress” is taking forever. When we reach this point, we start to question if we made the right decision (or even if there is something wrong with us) and maybe that is why we are not as successful as everyone else seems to be. You may find yourself working so hard – and the results are nowhere in sight.
I want to reassure you, if you feel this way; – you are exactly where you are supposed to be! The very important thing to remember is “Now is not the time to give up!”
Often when we are working too hard, and pushing too much not seeing the results we desire – we become exhausted and begin to question ourselves – and we simply feel like giving up.
But now is not the time to give up! You have come way too far and to turn back now! Below are four simple tips that will help you create forward momentum, much better results, increase your level of happiness and put the bounce back into your step!
1. Give Yourself Permission
One reason that we get stuck, overwhelmed, and frustrated is because we suffer burn out and fatigue from trying so hard. I have a private client who has doubled her success by practicing my coaching instruction to simply give herself permission to rest and stop pushing. If you are like me, you want results yesterday! However, I have learned (and coach many women) to slow down when struggle sets in. Don’t push.
When we are pushing and tired our reality gets distorted. Instead of pushing and beating yourself up for what you have not yet accomplished, give yourself permission to take a break when you’re tired and everything feels like you’re going against the current. Fatigue is one of the number one causes for burnout. It causes second-guessing of oneself — one of the biggest reasons people quit! When you feel like you are spinning your wheels – allow yourself to step away – regain clarity – and get your prospective back. By allowing yourself to rest and connect with joy, you’ll be happier and more successful. Creativity flows and you will be more productive. Commit today to giving yourself permission to rest.
2. Let Go
When we are pushing rather than in an effortless flow – we just need to let go. When you become blocked and stuck, it’s time to check in with how attached you are to the outcome. You will know when you are really attached to the outcome because you will feel exhausted and ready to give up.
I have seen private clients attract more clients, land speaking gigs, land a great job, and find the perfect match – just by releasing their attachment to the outcome. Once you let go, you will find yourself being more resourceful, thinking out of the box, and seeing new opportunities. Your happiness level will sky rocket and you will achieve the exact results you desire – if not better.
3. Push Through the Dip
You may feel like you have hit a low, but really it’s the transformational point leading you to success. You may feel like giving up even though you’re doing all the right things. You are doing all the right things – just not seeing the results. Seth Godin wrote an amazing book called “The Dip” — the plateau that separates the average from the best in the world. Knowing what to do when you hit the dip is so important. If you have hit the dip and you can honestly say that going forward is the best decision, then you continue to move boldly ahead until you reach the other side. It might feel like the hardest you have ever worked, but once you make it, the results will be tremendous.
4. Give Yourself the Gift of Support
Support and (accountability) is everything! Sometimes, we can’t see our own blind spots and this often slows us way down, frustrates us, and we end up working even harder. When you are doing things in your life and business that you have never done before, having support makes all the difference in the world!
Working with a coach will not only support you and give you accountability, it will push you out of your comfort zone. All my private clients are so amazed that prior to investing in coaching with me, they thought they either didn’t really need a coach – or felt guilty about choosing to invest in coaching. Now, after being coached they are committed to always having this type of support in their life. Why? Because, left to our own devices we don’t do what we should or could. When we work with a coach, we make more progress and do it more rapidly. I personally know this – not just from coaching hundreds of women – but from investing in myself and having MY OWN private coach.
Two Very Empowering Questions for 2012
January 3, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Sometimes it can be difficult to connect with what you most desire to bring into your life for the New Year, and this can become frustrating. Give yourself permission to release the struggle of not knowing or feeling unclear about your goals and shift your focus inward. Long lasting change starts on the inside. When you shift your focus and go within, your goals will naturally unfold and they will be aligned with your most authentic self.
Here is what I suggest you do NOW:
Go inward now and answer these two powerful and empowering questions:
1. What are your strengths? Make a list of them. How can you better utilize and apply your strengths to create a happier, more joyful and successful 2012?
For example: I was speaking with a client who is super creative, but didn’t necessarily access her creativity they way she had hoped in 2011. Her goals really weren’t defined. By answering these questions, her creativity goal became crystal clear for this year. She intends to collaborate with a group of creative people who together will utilize their creativity to deliver an award-wining product for people around the globe to enjoy.
2. What personal qualities would you like to strengthen in 2012?
Here are some examples of personal qualities to strengthen:
Be more bold, courageous and fearless – commit to not letting fear hold you back.
Claim your truth and it. Take more action to achieve true financial independence.
Be adventurous and have more fun – on a daily basis.
Let go! Let go of worry, self doubt, toxic people and food, any negative thought that makes you feel less than good, being nervous or fearful about what others think of you and most of all let go of anything that is standing in your way of living the life you desire!
Be free from hesitation and unnecessary stressors.
Be proactive rather than reactive.
Be grateful every day.
Be active in telling yourself what you really want and taking the action to get it.
Be conscious about setting boundaries with yourself and others – say NO to the things that deplete you and say YES more often to the things that energize you.
Be consistent, confident and focused on your top three priorities -everyday- always. Let nothing, no one or any negative thought get in your way!!! (I give this advice to my daughter everyday when she leaves for school!
As you begin to get clear on how you would like to strengthen yourself from the inside, it’s as if you are brightening your internal light. As your light shines brighter, you’ll find that you are attracting opportunities and resources that support your desires.
Once you have answered the two questions above and have chosen the qualities you would like to strengthen follow this three step process:
Step 1: Write a Goal Card with a positive affirmation to go along with each goal (keep it in the present tense).
Step 2: Take your Goal Cards and hang them up where you will see them. In your office, bathroom, car etc.
Step 3: Choose three actions you can take this week to begin to utilize or strengthen yourself.
Here is example of this three step process:
Goal: Become financially independent.
Affirmation: I feel amazing being financially responsible and have more money as a result.
Actions:
1. Look at your numbers and know them like the back of your hand – cost of living, income coming in and expenses going out.
2. Open any unopened bills. Money does not like to be ignored.
3. Balance your bank account and look at your bank balance everyday.
4. Arrange online banking and put systems in place to achieve financial freedom.
5. Where is there money on the table right now for you to pick up? In other words, where is there hidden money in your life or what action could you take to bring more money into your life?
6. Start a FFA – Financial Freedom Account
As you consider the quality you would like to strengthen, remember that the quickest way to create a better life is to focus on taking action. Release yourself from focusing on what you haven’t done or need to do. As you do this you will find that your confidence increases and you will trust your intuition more and achieving your goals will feel effortless.
How to Rock Your Life Out Authentically
September 6, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 3 Comments
Taking the time to get to know your wants and desires can take many women years and years. Do you have difficulty allowing yourself to become your true self? Programs like my Rock Your Body, Soul and Finances Program really allow you to stretch yourself to your limits, find your dreams and desires to become a strong and beautiful woman. By becoming this woman that is hiding inside of you, you can free your body, mind and spirit and get the control back into your life that has been hidden or is missing. By simply opening yourself up to the process you are allowing yourself to be free of the ties that bind and hold you back. Let’s get out from behind the rock, open up and be who you are meant to be!
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career – Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15. Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
Own Your Irresistibility!
August 23, 2011 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
One very sure way to feel amazing and create a life you love is to Own Your Irresistibility! Claiming your irresistibility is the key to fulfilling your potential as a woman and human being. Irresistibility is freedom to the soul!
You ARE meant to feel amazing and make an impact in this world.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible women: women who are willing to be bold, fully alive, enthusiastic, and expressive – regardless of the circumstance. Women who are not afraid to tell their truth and use their voice for what they believe. Women that honor their dreams, desires, bodies – and who are courageous and contribute their ideas.
Do You Wonder If You Are Irresistible?
Your irresistibility isn’t something you have to go out and get. It’s already inside of you waiting to come FULLY ALIVE.
I want to share the key to claiming your irresistibility. Your ability to fully own your irresistibility lies in the Present Moment. That is it.
When you are fully present, you have complete access to your highest self: the most creative, resourceful, brilliant, and gorgeous part of you. What is more irresistible than this? Nothing.
Being present means you stop going on mental vacations. Being present means being free from distraction, drama, and instead, releasing all negative self-image and chaos.
When you are present in the moment, you stop thinking you aren’t good enough or don’t have enough. Rather, you fully and actively engage your mind, body and soul within whatever it is you are doing in that present moment. You choose to see yourself as brilliant and beautiful – no matter what has happened in the past!
You release those thoughts about the past that keep you captive and keep you obsessively worrying about your future. You bring your focus into the here and now.
Please bring your undivided attention to this moment and fully absorb what I am about to share with you. Emerge yourself in this golden morsel of wisdom.
The world needs you.
Your irresistibility is the greatest gift you can choose for yourself and share with the world. When you step into all that makes you irresistible – you feel amazing and your decision, choices and actions are much more empowered – than when you are not owing it.
Your irresistibility is feeling from within – in the present moment…here and now…FREE of mental chatter. Full of self-love and positive self-talk.
You have a very powerful mind and maybe you are thinking, “Who am I – to do what I really want to do?”
Please hear this: You are not your thoughts. However, you are the magnificent one behind them. You are more than enough: wise, glorious, and very capable of doing that which your heart yearns to do.
You are perfect in this very present moment. No other moment matters.
You deserve to live in the biggest and boldest version of you.
Irresistibility is a expansive feeling within your soul and body – a sensation and taste of succulence. Complete freedom of judgement or self-criticism.
There is nothing else you need – except to fully step into your personal power and embrace all your unique talents…Free of self-doubt.
When you do this, you will find yourself completely comfortable in your own skin, simply irresistible to others, connected to your abundance, surrounded by amazing people, expanding your career and business – and opportunities will flow in like you wouldn’t believe!
Irresistibility Action Challenge:
1. Name three things you really appreciate about you.
2. List three ways you are already Irresistible.
3. Bring your awareness to the present moment of acknowledging these things you just wrote about you – and fully breathe it in.
Do you feel yourself lighten up? Most of us take ourselves too seriously, not seeing who we really are and what we are fully capable.
Remember, a very sure way to create a life you love is to Own Your Irresistibility! Claiming your irresistibility is the key to fulfilling your potential as a woman and human being.
You ARE meant to make an impact in this world.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible women: women who are willing to be bold, fully alive, enthusiastic, and expressive – regardless of the circumstances. Women who are not afraid to tell their truth and use their voice for what they believe. Women that honor their dreams and desires, and that are courageous and contribute their ideas.
Stop Wondering If You Are Irresistible – and OWN That You ARE!
Surrender to your inner greatness and be present to fully accepting it. Let go of resistance it never-ever serves your best.
I would love to hear your answers to this week’s Irresistibility Action Challenge.
