The Top 7 Things That Hold Women Back From Taking The Big Leap
May 29, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Do you have a big vision for your life and lots of ideas that you would like act upon, but your stuck in rut wondering when life will shift for once and for all?
I have the honor of coaching some of the most amazing women on this planet. What I have realized is that most women have a few things in common: They are brilliant, desire a really succulent life, have a really big vision (that often scares them right out of their panties), and have AMAZING ideas. However, these same women are almost always fearful, unsure and full of self-doubt. Their ideas never really get implemented because they are stuck, overwhelmed, frustrated and unclear. I really relate to this because I used to be the same exact way!
All of these brilliant women have a strong desire to make a difference in this lifetime. They want to leave a legacy behind and help others by doing what they love. What is really interesting is when one of my clients gets really clear and connects to her heart’s desire, she becomes aware that if she were living her desire FULLY, she would be so happy, unstoppable, fearless and feel a complete sense of freedom. Can you resonate with this?
If we have brilliant ideas and heart-felt desires, why do we struggle with creating a life on purpose? Where’s the disconnect? I am giving you the Top 7 things that Hold Women Back from Taking the Big Leap: Indecision, Procrastination, Self Doubt, Worry, Fear, Waiting and Negative Body Image.
Here’s the deal: These 7 things are very easy to overcome with the right mindset and support. This is easier than you think, though it may not presently feel this way.
Below are the top 7 Things that Hold Women Back from Taking the Big Leap. Read through them to see where you may stopping yourself then commit to live your purpose FULL OUT NOW. If you need support, for heaven’s sake, just allow yourself to have it! The only person holding you back is you. What’s perfect about this is you can change it by doing the exact thing your soul keeps telling you to do. It’s the very thing you keep ignoring.
1. Indecision:
Indecision means putting off making decisions or not making a decision at all. Successful women reach decisions promptly and hardly change them, if at all, slowly. They have deep trust and feel confident they change course at any given time.
Making quick decisions will liberate you.
People who are stuck and aren’t living the life they truly want are wishy-washy and change their mind frequently. They say yes/no/maybe over and over again. Ultimately they never come to any decision, so their life does not change – which leads to number two (see below).
2. Procrastination:
Which we all know procrastination is putting off what needed to be done yesterday until tomorrow. Your life is now and is waiting for you to fully show up in the present moment.
Get to understand and become aware of why you are procrastinating, instead of being unconscious to this behavior.
If you have a big dream, but you procrastinate, there is huge incongruency. It is worth your time to invest and understand why you are putting off the exact things you say you desire. Please stop fooling yourself that you will do it tomorrow. Tomorrow never happens. You have today to LIVE FULLY. Make it count!
3. Self Doubt:
Self doubt is a big cover up! It shows up in the form of feeling blah, making excuses or justifications for the reason why it won’t work out right now. It is disguised as envy, jealously, and criticizing yourself or others.
Waiting for the perfect time or perfect whatever (body size or right amount of money) to commit to something is really just you doubting your abilities.
If you are filled with self doubt, you need more clarity. You will also benefit with the support of another to champion you and help you develop the self confidence you need. When you end self doubt, you can move forward and take action on your dreams.
There is no need to doubt yourself. If your mind can conceive it, then you absolutely can achieve it!
4. Worry;
Worry is one the biggest forms of distraction I know. It takes you out of the present moment and takes you into the future – the unknown – which is scary for most. However, in my experience the future is filled with wonder and delight. This is achieved by letting go of worry and getting present with your self, your life and dreams.
Worry is a form of fear and is just an illusion about something that may happen in the future. It a form of “trying” to control an outcome.
What if you let go of worry and allowed something amazing to happen?
5. Fear:
Fear is not real (period). It is an illusion created in the mind by the ego. The ego’s primary role is keeping you from growing and expanding. It wants to keep you small, but you were born to big.
6. Waiting – What the heck are you waiting for?
You want it now – right? So why are you waiting to go for it? Get clear about this.
Most often – women wait for the right time, the right amount of money, etc. I learned how to completely love myself through choosing not to wait – to go after what I want – especially when things aren’t perfect. Waiting is stagnant energy that only creates more stagnant energy – it shows up in painful thoughts, self-sabotage, emotional eating, etc. – fueling more fire to any belief that you can’t do it. And honestly, waiting does not feel good. When you decide and take action NOW it fuels fire to the belief that you have everything you need to rock your life and body!
7. Negative Body Image:
Last week I spoke with a woman who shared her struggle of her own body image. She told me she often isolates in her house. When it comes to going out to events, she gets nervous about who will be there and how they will judge her, and this often stops her from going – or if she does go she immediately starts comparing herself to other women.
Body image and self-perception matter deeply when we give them the power to alter our behavior in a way that does not feel good. In our personal and professional lives, a negative body image blocks us from having more deeper intimacy, wonderful experiences, making more money – it just plain stops us from creating the ultimate life, health, body, and even financial status, we deeply desire.
Love and fear can’t exist at the same time.
Successful women have big fears but they understand what fear is and what it is not. They face their fear and do it anyway. They connect to self -love and value, belief, trust, and faith. Developing self confidence diminishes fear so you can move forward and create your life on your terms.
Please do yourself a big, big favor and commit to move beyond these 7 things that keep you stuck. Stop waiting for the perfect time, let go of the need for complete certainty, the fear of scarcity, the struggle with your body weight and waiting for the right amount of money. If you don’t, you will be waiting a long, long time. Your time to shine is NOW!
Please share with me how you will allow yourself to shine by posting your comments here on my blog!
28 Ways to Rock Your Own World!
April 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career - Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15.Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
4 Tips to Keep Your Dreams Moving Forward
January 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
I know sometimes we just feel like giving up! It seems like we are not making progress as we had hoped for the New Year and often it feels like “making progress” is taking forever. When we reach this point, we start to question if we made the right decision (or even if there is something wrong with us) and maybe that is why we are not as successful as everyone else seems to be. You may find yourself working so hard – and the results are nowhere in sight.
I want to reassure you, if you feel this way; – you are exactly where you are supposed to be! The very important thing to remember is “Now is not the time to give up!”
Often when we are working too hard, and pushing too much not seeing the results we desire – we become exhausted and begin to question ourselves – and we simply feel like giving up.
But now is not the time to give up! You have come way too far and to turn back now! Below are four simple tips that will help you create forward momentum, much better results, increase your level of happiness and put the bounce back into your step!
1. Give Yourself Permission
One reason that we get stuck, overwhelmed, and frustrated is because we suffer burn out and fatigue from trying so hard. I have a private client who has doubled her success by practicing my coaching instruction to simply give herself permission to rest and stop pushing. If you are like me, you want results yesterday! However, I have learned (and coach many women) to slow down when struggle sets in. Don’t push.
When we are pushing and tired our reality gets distorted. Instead of pushing and beating yourself up for what you have not yet accomplished, give yourself permission to take a break when you’re tired and everything feels like you’re going against the current. Fatigue is one of the number one causes for burnout. It causes second-guessing of oneself — one of the biggest reasons people quit! When you feel like you are spinning your wheels – allow yourself to step away – regain clarity – and get your prospective back. By allowing yourself to rest and connect with joy, you’ll be happier and more successful. Creativity flows and you will be more productive. Commit today to giving yourself permission to rest.
2. Let Go
When we are pushing rather than in an effortless flow – we just need to let go. When you become blocked and stuck, it’s time to check in with how attached you are to the outcome. You will know when you are really attached to the outcome because you will feel exhausted and ready to give up.
I have seen private clients attract more clients, land speaking gigs, land a great job, and find the perfect match – just by releasing their attachment to the outcome. Once you let go, you will find yourself being more resourceful, thinking out of the box, and seeing new opportunities. Your happiness level will sky rocket and you will achieve the exact results you desire – if not better.
3. Push Through the Dip
You may feel like you have hit a low, but really it’s the transformational point leading you to success. You may feel like giving up even though you’re doing all the right things. You are doing all the right things – just not seeing the results. Seth Godin wrote an amazing book called “The Dip” — the plateau that separates the average from the best in the world. Knowing what to do when you hit the dip is so important. If you have hit the dip and you can honestly say that going forward is the best decision, then you continue to move boldly ahead until you reach the other side. It might feel like the hardest you have ever worked, but once you make it, the results will be tremendous.
4. Give Yourself the Gift of Support
Support and (accountability) is everything! Sometimes, we can’t see our own blind spots and this often slows us way down, frustrates us, and we end up working even harder. When you are doing things in your life and business that you have never done before, having support makes all the difference in the world!
Working with a coach will not only support you and give you accountability, it will push you out of your comfort zone. All my private clients are so amazed that prior to investing in coaching with me, they thought they either didn’t really need a coach – or felt guilty about choosing to invest in coaching. Now, after being coached they are committed to always having this type of support in their life. Why? Because, left to our own devices we don’t do what we should or could. When we work with a coach, we make more progress and do it more rapidly. I personally know this – not just from coaching hundreds of women – but from investing in myself and having MY OWN private coach.
How to Rock Your Life Out Authentically
September 6, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 3 Comments
Taking the time to get to know your wants and desires can take many women years and years. Do you have difficulty allowing yourself to become your true self? Programs like my Rock Your Body, Soul and Finances Program really allow you to stretch yourself to your limits, find your dreams and desires to become a strong and beautiful woman. By becoming this woman that is hiding inside of you, you can free your body, mind and spirit and get the control back into your life that has been hidden or is missing. By simply opening yourself up to the process you are allowing yourself to be free of the ties that bind and hold you back. Let’s get out from behind the rock, open up and be who you are meant to be!
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career – Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15. Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
16 Powerful Ways to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin
August 9, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 2 Comments
I have coached hundreds of women over the years that have struggled – or are currently struggling and in pain with body image issues – feeling uncomfortable in their body. The truth is, they are not living the life they really want to live. It’s really holding them back from living a life with passion blocking them from going after what they want and keeping it!
I completely feel their pain. I really understand it, as I hid for many years behind my body image issues that left me feeling so uncomfortable in my own skin.
It took me a long, long time to fully understand that the struggle with my body image was keeping me from growing and expanding my entire life. I realized, in the process of struggling with my body image issues, I was just distracted in the un-truth and disconnected from my personal power.
If I had been connected to my truth and personal power, I would not have been critical of myself and my body at all. I would have honored myself and only noticed my beauty and wonder. I would have taken action like nobodys business to create my most yummy life.
Instead, I stayed in pain and missed opportunities for fun, love, and adventure.
My BIG turning point was when I realized my body images issues were nothing but a BIG DISTRACTION keeping me in hiding, preventing me from taking risk and living the life I really wanted to live. My body image issues thoughts, feelings, and actions –were creating the exact things I didn’t want in my life.
I deeply began to understand that obsessing about my body was a big decoy, because what I was really afraid of were the following:
- Not being enough
- Failing
- Not measuring up
- My ability to receive love
- My life change… and so on, and so on.
I NOW know how to live a life Free from struggling with body image issues, and I want to help you find this Freedom, too. Its very empowering and life changing to feel vibrant and amazing in your skin.
I learned a huge reason why we struggle. Struggling only keeps us in the same place. Struggling keeps us from expanding our life, health and business. Body image issues constrict us (at every level) and deplete and drain us, and keep us imprisoned. It blocks true intimacy with life, keeping us from savoring or experiencing it fully.
When we obsess about our body, it is a huge indication that something is out of alignment within our heart, mind and life. It shows us we are disconnected from our truth and personal power and are hiding from what we are really afraid of.
Many women I have worked with have struggled with their body image. It breaks my heart, because I know these women really desire a full and bodacious life with complete emotional and financial Fr*eedom.
Body image issues are a big distraction, keeping you confined from taking action and fully creating the life you want. Think about this for a moment – Who would you be and what would do if you werent struggling with body image issues? Would you be confident, happy, blissful, and really successful?
Here are ways to Free yourself and move away from body image issues and into full Fr*eedom. Where you love your body, have sweet love for you and allow much bigger success to come to you:
1. Your body is completely beautiful allow yourself to own this and stop denying it. It may not be where you want it to be, but you have the power to change this. For now, see your beauty.
2. Your body is brilliant and takes care of all things for you. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it and listen to it.
3. Create a list of all the wonderful things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often. Example: I love my legs because they take me great places and I get to see so many wonderful places with them.
4. Make peace and be Free. Your body is a beautiful vessel that carries your soul.
5. When you obsess about your body image, ask yourself this question: “What is it that I really want in my life that I do not yet have and why am I holding myself back?”
6. Visualize feeling amazing in your body and skin. Fully connect to it. This will instantly empower you to make better choices for you.
7. Re-focus on something that you really love about your body (you will find it if you are willing to look with love). If love seems too much – then start with what you like.
8. Reflect on all the things you really want to accomplish in your life and business. Realize that if you shift your focus away from negative thoughts about your body, you’ll move into beautiful thoughts of achieving your true dreams and desires. This shift will instantly make you feel better and motivate you to take action to go after what you want.
9. Make a list of the things you have put off due to body image issues, then go and take action on one item. Notice how fantastic this feels.
10. Write a Sacred Contract letter to your body with your commitment for honoring it starting today and include a thank you for all its wonder and beauty.
11. Rest and nourish your body like royalty. Rest, replenish, stretch, massage, hydrate, and moisturize it. Stop pushing so hard rest.
12. Exercise because it makes you feel better, connects you with your personal power, and makes your body healthy, strong, and shapely.
13. Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your body and connect to this feeling again. You will take inspired action from this feeling state.
14. Write a list of at least 10 positive things about yourself and add to this list daily.
15. When you find yourself being harsh on your body, get curious and find out what you’re really afraid of.
16. Please, release attachment to the way your body used to be. Meet yourself where you are today – so you can be Free of struggle and this will empower you to take the action you need for the changes you desire.
Doing even one of these action items will shift your energy, have you feeling much better in your own skin, connect you with your beautiful body, and move you into a place that allows more abundance in your life.
5 Things NOT to DO – EVER!
July 5, 2011 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
1. Avoid Money
Money loves your attention and understanding. The more attention and understanding you give to your money, the 
more you have of it – it’s that simple.
Money does not have power over us. It only has power over us when we relinquish our power to it.
Every time you avoid looking at your bank account, avoid opening your bills, keeping them instead in a pile, or tossing them into the trash unopened, you spend more money than what you actually have – due to avoiding your reality. Each time you do this, you are choosing to continue on the path to more struggles with money, instead of creating your abundance. There is no way to avoid this truth – you must take new action if you are to bring more money in.
Every single time you avoid money, you demonstrate to the universe that you believe in lack. You are demonstrating that you cannot handle more money, because you struggle to handle the money you have now. This avoidance is blocking the flow of money into your life.
The amount of money in your life today is a true reflection about what you believe you can or cannot have – that is it.
You deserve to give your attention and understanding to money. Choose to honor yourself right now and look at your money today. Write your expenses and income out on paper, look at your banking statements on line to see where all your money is going to and get clear about what you need to change within so you can create and have more money in your life.
2. Settle for LESS – In any area of your life.
“Suffer not one exception” -unknown
Often we settle for less and don’t even realize we are doing it. I want you to really think about this. Think about how it applies to your life, and decide to move yourself – today – to get clear about where you are settling for far less than you deserve in your life.
Are you in a relationship that brings you down, rather than bringing out the best in you?
Are you in a marriage that you are settling for because you are afraid that you can’t survive on your own, financially?
- Do you believe that you can’t lose weight, or create ultimate health in your life?
- Are you unhappy in your current career?
- Do your children show you disrespect?
- Do you have chaos and clutter in your life?
- Do you choose to do nothing to change your life, instead of empowering yourself, and getting the necessary support to transform your life?
- Do you tell yourself you want to decorate your house, travel, take a dance class – but then never do?
We often settle for putting our needs on the back burner, for less money than we deserve, for sex that is unfulfilling, for clothes that make us feel uncomfortable, for broken and unrepaired things, and for waiting until tomorrow to do what we need to do today. We even settle for feeling like we are flawed, or less than acceptable in some capacity.
3. Be Uncomfortable in Your Body
You deserve to feel amazing in your own skin I promise you there is nothing that tastes, or feels better than this!
We can be uncomfortable in our bodies for a number of different reasons. The most common, is when we don’t speak out in truth. Or perhaps, for you it is when you are not living life on purpose, lacking passion, unwilling or unable to ask for needs or wants. Maybe you are saying yes when you mean no, carrying extra body fat and feeling uncomfortable in your clothes. Let’s face it, when we are uncomfortable in our bodies, we don’t take risks. We hold back from doing the exact thing we so desire to do, because we unconsciously hold back from fully revealing ourselves to others, thereby keeping people at a distance.
When you embrace and address why you feel uncomfortable in your body – you can than empower yourself to change it by getting the support you need, plan in place and the
Where do you feel uncomfortable in your body and why?
4. Anything Less than Impeccable Self-Care – Will never do.
When you create impeccable self care in your life not only to you feel amazing but you have so much more to give to the people you love your career and you have the energy to do the things you really want to do.
- Self-care is about honor yourself and your needs.
- Do you take at least 30 minutes for yourself each day?
- Do you feed yourself and your soul with fuel, love, happiness and nourishment?
- Do you brush your teeth before you go to bed and have a bedtime ritual?
- Do you have positive self-talk or is your talk filled with self-punishment?
- Do you prioritize your work schedule? Do you have a start and end time, or do you work around the clock never really creating or completing anything – yet always feeling like you are working.
5. Allow Distraction and Procrastination
Distraction and procrastination keep us living in a very small version of who we were born to be. It often leaves us in indecision mode – avoiding the decision we know we need to make…the exact decision that would change our life in a positive way. What is important to know is that if your life is filled with distractions and you know you are procrastinating, you have the free choice to decide to do something about this – unless of course you like living your life here.
I know you don’t – and I also want you to know that you have the power to change your life, get what you want (and keep it)!
Most distraction and procrastination is a result of not having a clear plan, not believing you can, and not moving beyond the blocks that keep you stuck here.
Do yourself a big loving favor and please stop:
- Focusing on what everyone else is doing, or not doing.
- Eating sugar, or foods that serve your body – because of fear.
- Thinking, even for one second, that you can’t do something.
- Hiding behind your computer.
- Hiding out in your life.
June 7, 2011 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
This Week’s Question:
Hi Karen,
I really love your energy and reading your face book and Twitter posts. Just reading them motivates me. Can you please share some tips on how you have this energy so I can get some of it in my life. I think it would help me make some changes in my life.
Thank you.
Jennifer, LA
Karen’s Answer:
1. Wake up early – I know most people want more sleep, but if you read and practice my other tips below, you will have more energy to wake up earlier. When you wake up earlier, create a morning ritual for yourself and only do things for YOU during this time.
2. Create a Ritual & Go to Local Farmers – Obtain a list of local farmers and local Farmer’s Markets in your area – preferably the organic farms. Plan a day to visit and do your shopping for greens, vegetables, fresh herbs, and meats. Make it an adventure and try a different fruit, vegetable, or other product. I have created a Saturday morning ritual and part of it includes visiting my Local Farmer’s market after an amazing workout. It truly is a satisfying and fulfilling experience to nurture my body, mind, and spirit – but it is also great to celebrate the local farmers and all their dedication and hard work (they are the best entrepreneurs!)
3. Power Up with a Green Smoothie: Green smoothies are my FAVORITE! Explore the power of greens! Making green smoothies is fun and will add a glow to your skin and vibrancy to your step…not to mention the improved mental clarity and focus! I can tell you from my own personal experience that there is so much power in drinking Green Smoothies – it’s a sure way to get your juju back – and instantly!
4. Drink lots of clean, purified water. You will be amazed at the difference in the way you feel when you are well hydrated. I replenish my body with a gallon of clean water a day and will never go back to less than this, because of the huge difference in how I feel – and I am all about feeling good! I know a gallon may seem like a lot, so start off with a ½ gallon of clean water and work your way up. Allow yourself the experience of feeling true hydration. The benefits are so wonderful – glowing skin, no more sugar or salt cravings, detoxification, and much more energy.
5. Good Fats: Good fats keep your metabolism on fire…burning – and this is good for your brain! It helps you feel satisfied. Be sure to include good fats each day. To do this, try Udo’s oil, avocado, or raw cod liver oil. Nuts are also a great source of good fat, however trade in the processed nuts and eat raw only – you will notice you will not overeat them, your digestive system will digest them with ease, and the flavor of raw nuts is very robust.
6. Refined sugars and processed starches are the devil – dump them like a bad freaking habit. Give yourself five days to eliminate them completely and you are going to feel a huge difference in your body and a zest for life – guaranteed! When you do this, you will wake up ready for the day instead of hitting the snooze button. You’ll feel calm, and even begin to have more passion! Learn about the impact of refined sugar and processed foods on your health, acid/alkaline balance, and intestinal health. Add raw organic veggies, sprouts, green drinks, green smoothies, enzymes, vitamins, and minerals to your diet.
7. Move Your Gorgeous Body! Work up a sweat! You will release feel good endorphins and get your lymph system moving, which carries away the waste and toxins! Walk, Jump Rope, Yoga, Run, Trampoline, Bike Ride, take a dance class, or swim. Try something new – or reconnect to a form of exercise you once loved. Just do it!
8. Turn up the “Feel Good”! Find, and regularly commit to activities that help you feel good and renewed. Some ideas: meditation, gratitude journaling, guided relaxation or visualization CD’s, nature, bubble baths followed by lathering your skin in your favorite body lotion. The point is to renew, add more you time, and just de-stress. Often we hold more stress in our bodies than we realize.
April 12, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 1 Comment
This Week’s Question:
Karen,
I am always procrastinating and so tired of it! I have one day that is good, get things done and than three days of procrastination. It’s driving me nuts and I am beginning to think something is wrong with me. Could I be addicted to procrastination. Can you please give me some tips on ending procrastination?
- Julie
Karen’s Answer:
Hey Julie,
There is nothing wrong with you and your not addicted to procrastination – don’t let your ego fool you! You are comfortable – that’s all. But, you also really desire more. (Procrastination is just the avoidance of taking action to get things done.)
Just because you know it well and it’s familiar – doesn’t mean you need to let it rule you. Imagine your new normal state of being — living in the life of you dream of – can you picture this? The more success we achieve, the more we get uncomfortable. Taking bigger leaps to achieve the ultimate success we crave, means moving the heck out of our comfort zone. And, procrastination is just a big disguise that keeps us stuck to what we know. Once you break the cycle – you step fully into the decision to be empowered!
Moving beyond procrastination means letting go of settling, getting clear about our desires, and be willing to get uncomfortable.
The following are my top 6 tips to conquering procrastination and living the life you crave!
1. Make A Commitment to Yourself!
Make a commitment to yourself that will show up each day in your life as the woman you were born to be! Now hold yourself to it, because you deserve to have the life you desire. Make a powerful commitment to yourself today.
2. Define Your Burning Desires!
Please do yourself a favor and stop telling yourself you do not know what you want. It may feel this way but your desire are within you right this moment, they may be covered up and been left on the back burner. Instead, make time to get clear about what you want and own this! Telling yourself you don’t know what you want is a sure way to keep procrastination around.
Create space, get clear, and really define what you want. Own your best life now by doing this exercise.
Whatever it is that you desire, write it down and make a list.
It’s like this — when you go to the grocery store you make a list of all the things you need right? If you didn’t have this list you would most likely forget some items, right? Make time today to write your desire out and be specific.
When we procrastinate, it’s often because what we are planning to do is not really aligned with what we truly want. Once you take time to get clear on your desires you will than need to take the action needed to manifest them.
3. Health, Well-Being, and High Energy!
Who has time to feel awful? Not you! You are meant to feel alive and on purpose. When you put your well-being first, your life and success dramatically improve. You will have so much more of the feel good energy needed to make positive changes in your life and take action on the things that matter most to you.
If you feel awful, chances are you’ll end up procrastinating and begin thinking something is wrong with you…because you keep on procrastinating.
What can you do today to empower yourself to have better well being in your life? Write down three things you can do – NOW.
4. Big Difference between Baby Steps and Acting Small.
“The difference between taking baby steps and acting small, is that one prepares you for success, the other for a fall.”
Cha, cha, cha -
The Universe
Setting small goals for yourself will create forward momentum and make it much easier to do the next thing. Small goals that you accomplish put YOU in the driver’s seat, which makes you feel great!
Women often get caught up in “all or nothing” thinking and end up sabotaging themselves. Instead of thinking all or nothing, start thinking about the momentum and consistency made possible with small goals and baby steps. I promise you will feel so much better.
Procrastination keeps us playing a very small game. But, you are here to succeed – no doubt about it!
5. Visualize Life Without Procrastination.
Visualize you…showing up in your life in the biggest, boldest version of yourself. See and feel this. Imagine a life with no procrastination.
Close your eyes and see yourself in your life doing what matters most to you. How do you feel?
Use empowering words and STOP referring to yourself as a procrastinator. Would you rather been known as a women who kicks ass — or one who just procrastinates?
6. (JFDI) Just Freaking Do it!
JFDI NOW! – get out of your head and into your life. No excuses. Waiting until everything is perfect or you’re “in the mood” will always leave you two steps away from procrastination.
There is freedom and ultimate liberation when we Just Freaking Do IT!!!
Tell me what you will JFD today?
Why Are You Settling for Less?
March 1, 2011 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
I used to settle a lot. There were years when I’d accept so much less than I wanted because I just thought that’s the way life was. At other times, I didn’t even know exactly what it was I wanted; I just knew that whatever it was, it was 
missing. I knew I had a longing, I just didn’t know I had a choice.
I wasn’t empowered to make the decisions that would move me toward living my authentic life. I disconnected myself from my inner truth because what I found there scared me. At the time, it seemed easier to hide out in the relationship I was unsatisfied with and try to convince myself that my career was just fine. And, I suffered some major consequences. When you settle for less than you want and deserve, you are acting from a place of fear. What I learned from my experience is that in all things, we must act from a place of love.
When you choose to be driven by love, you will begin to believe that life can be exactly how you want it to be. When you choose to become conscious of your truth, you will realize that the power of choice is available to you.
Ask yourself, “Why are you settling?”
We influence our life’s experience through the choices we make. And I’m talking, all of the choices we make. If you think about it, there is no such thing as a small choice. Every decision we make — choosing to eat or not eat, to say or not say, to listen to your inner voice or not listen — has a consequence. Whether it’s short or long term, with good or less than desirable results, each choice has an effect. Our power and influence over our lives comes from our ability to make choices. When we settle, we lose sight of that power – knowing somewhere in our heart that our inner truth has been compromised.
Examples of settling for less:
- I guess this is as good as it gets.
- It doesn’t really matter to me if I get married or have children.
- As long as I have 6-8 clients, that’s better than nothing.
- I can do this by myself. I don’t need any support.
- It’s better to have these friends than no friends.
- I can live on $2000 a month, so that’ll be good enough.
- At least I have a job, even if it’s one I hate.
- I’ll never lose these last 20 pounds, so why even try?
Ignoring your inner truth inevitably leads to self-sabotaging behavior – overeating, procrastination, a lack of personal responsibility – and ultimately, pain. Feelings of anger, boredom, frustration, loneliness and hopelessness take over and lead to chaos in our lives. The only reason we deny ourselves our inner truth is because our conscious self is too frightened to take bold steps, so we make less than authentic choices.
Take a look at where you are settling for less. Is it in your career, your relationship, your well-being? Make a list of those areas and describe how you’re settling.
Examples:
- I don’t like the way my hair stylist does my hair, but I keep going back.
- I buy and eat cheap, un-nutritious food.
- I continue to work with clients who submit late payments.
Now, make a list of the consequences you have endured as the result of settling.
Examples:
- I never feel cute and I resent paying for a haircut I don’t like.
- My food isn’t providing the nutrients that my body needs for proper health.
- I can’t pay my bills on time.
Ask yourself again. Why are you settling? Usually, we settle out of fear. We fear that we won’t have enough, that we’re taking too big of a risk, or we’re better off staying put rather than taking a chance. Take a good look at the underlying fear that leads to you settling for less. Is that fear rational? Why are you allowing it to hold you back?
Honor Your Power of Choice
Every choice you make has the power to shift your life direction. Intuitively you know that you desire more. Choose to end the chaos created by settling for less and begin to get clear about what you authentically want in your life. Change can be very uncomfortable; it’s time to get comfortable with it. Now, if you’re ready to commit to continuous growth and expansion, pay attention to what I just told you. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Never once have I heard any woman regret making the decision to no longer settle in her life. In fact, the reaction is always the opposite. “Look at the new abundant path I’m on! I can’t believe I settled for so long!” Getting comfortable being uncomfortable will lead you to take action and create the life you want and deserve. Empower your inner truth and honor your power of choice.
Stop settling for less.
