“It’s So Uncomfortable!”
September 18, 2012 by Karen Fagan · 3 Comments
I always tell my clients, “For change to happen you must be willing to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.” And why do I tell them that? Because it is 100% true.
Now, for most people, we’ll do just about anything to not feel uncomfortable. We resist, push back, avoid, and procrastinate. We become moody, we sleep too much, eat too much, drink too much . . . the list just goes on and on. But what are these actions doing to service our growth and ourselves? Absolutely nothing.
Let’s face it: change is uncomfortable. Feeling comfortable comes from knowing what to expect, maintaining a status quo and staying within our same old boundaries. In order to make a change, we have to tear down those walls, climb beyond our self-imposed barriers and allow the Big Breakdown to happen.
The Big Breakdown is the uncomfortable period where the change starts to take place. It comes through painful thoughts like, “Who the heck are you to do that?” Systems go haywire, like computers crashing and dropped conference call recordings. At times there are physical manifestations in our bodies like headaches, heartaches, and bellyaches. We feel angry, frustrated and scared so we participate in actions like avoidance when we know, deep down, that it would serve us best to be facing our fears and discomfort head on.
And you know what? All this discomfort is a good thing! Just beyond the Big Breakdown is the Big Breakthrough where you’ll find everything you want and need to grow and succeed. Isn’t this cool? Actually, everything we need and want is right under our noses; the Big Breakdown is the Universe’s way of getting us to step back and see it. Our initial reaction to the Big Breakdown is to shut it off and run away. I’ve been there and I totally get it. However, I’ve taught myself to be comfortable with the uncomfortable, knowing that right past the Big Breakdown is the Big Breakthrough. . . and that’s where the magic happens.
Here are some tips to bust through your own Big Breakdown to reap the benefits of your Big Breakthrough!
- Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Learn to master this one and your progress will skyrocket, and you’ll experience ongoing growth and success. When it comes to accepting the changes in your life, feel your fear . . . and then release it. Once you release your negative, scary thoughts, you allow new opportunities to come into your life. The longer you avoid feeling your feelings, the longer it takes to eventually release them which only delays what you’re really looking for… The Big Breakthrough.Change is going to happen. And there’s one thing I know for sure: good things always come from change . . . even if we can’t see it right away. Learn to trust in the process. Get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable and get ready to fly!
- Create a “feel good” state of being.Your emotional state is a big key to what you are attracting to your life. If you want to attract more, you must release old paradigms and false beliefs about yourself. When we are confronted with change, our minds automatically think about what we’re giving up, not what we’re gaining. That mindset keeps us in a place of lack rather than moving us into a place of abundance.Create a “feel good” state of being to move into abundance and attract all that the Universe has to offer you. Instead of focusing on what you may not have right now, focus on what you want. Take a moment to visualize yourself as being enveloped in goodness and well-being. Close your eyes and breathe deeply while focusing on all that you want to attract to your life.Here’s a list to help you get started:
- Love
- Trust
- Faith
- Joy
- Passion
- Enthusiasm
- Contentment
Imagine that you have all of these things, and more. Allow yourself to believe in and expect positive results from the change in your life. Trust that what you really seek will appear.
Are You Willing?
Ask and answer the following questions for yourself:
- Are you willing to trade short-term discomfort for long-term success?
- How badly do you want your ideal business and delicious lifestyle?
- Are you willing to find another way when presented with a road-block?
Just because your bridge telephone line disconnects during your live conference call, you completely spill paint all over a great piece of your artwork, or your important meeting gets canceled, don’t take it as a sign that you’re no good at your chosen path, that you’re not meant to do it or that you’re doomed.
When things like this happen, remind yourself of your answers to the above questions. See these minor disruptions as opportunities to improve your systems. Perhaps you would benefit from delegating tasks, asking for help or simply taking a break. It’s all up to you! You get to determine what your Big Breakdown means and how you are going respond to it. Will you use it to become empowered or disempowered? (Hint: Pick empowered!)
Embrace the Big Breakdown to get to your Big Breakthrough, release resistance and allow the Universe to work its magic! I promise, it will be worth it!
I would love to hear from you – please share with us how you are getting comfortable with being uncomfortable by posting a comment here on my blog.
Go Guilt & Regret FR*EE Now!
September 11, 2012 by Karen Fagan · 1 Comment
I often hear from clients that what most keeps them in a disempowered place is the feeling of guilt over something they did, or living with regret over something they did not do. Either of these can deplete energy and block one’s ability to make clear decisions and take massive action. Both can hold us back from what we want most.
I believe in filling our souls up with so much feel good energy that we simply live empowered, unstoppable in our ability to take action, while living FR*EE from joy-robbing guilt and regret! Imagine being in full alignment with positive thoughts every day; feeling empowered, taking meaningful action toward your goals – what you most desire – without negative thoughts. It is possible to live completely FR*EE of the guilt, regret, and all the “could have’s”, “might have’s”, and “should have’s”. All that is necessary is that you give yourself permission to do it.
You deserve an abundance of clean and feel good energy. This is the exact energy that will build your self-confidence, FR*EE you from second-guessing, and spark the clarity and action needed to accomplish your goals. So, give yourself permission, today, to begin to practice living your life guilt and regret FR*EE!
9 Things You Can Do to Practice Living Life Guilt-FR*EE With No Regrets:
- See Opportunity – Not Mistakes. When things fall apart or don’t turn out the way you had hoped, don’t spend time beating yourself up. Look for the opportunity to learn, instead. There is always opportunity – quite often, what appears as the worst situation, is the biggest opportunity in disguise. Don’t allow the situation to defeat you – overcome the situation by making good use of the opportunity it presents.
- Follow Your Own Path. This is the direct route to happiness. Decide today to get off the path that is depleting you, leaving you frustrated and unhappy. When we give up what we desire and “try” to walk on someone else’s path it never works! Instead, we will only find ourselves living with guilt and regret. However, when you claim your inner truth and live your life on your own path, you will find yourself giving and sharing out of your abundance – empowered and productive!
- Make FUN a Sacred Ritual. Put the FUN back in your life and do it like you brush your teeth, daily and with diligence. Connect yourself with laughter – not once in awhile – but on a daily basis. Simply start by smiling more and see what a huge, positive impact this has in your life. You’ll be amazed at how often you receive a smile in return for one of yours, and the way it can immediately energize you.
- Relax & Get Into Your Flow. Breathe more fully and deeply. Recall a time in your life when you were in your “Sweet Spot” and return to this place today. What were you doing? What felt so great? Identify the answers to these two questions. Let go of resistance and move into your flow. You will instantly feel better. You will know you are in your flow, because it will feel, and taste, better than anything in the world!
- Be Adventurous. See life as an adventure, not just something you must deal with. Create little and big adventures in your life. A little adventure could be driving a different route to work or the grocery store, trying a new taste of drink or food. This will open your mind and your senses to experiencing things you have never felt, seen, or even noticed before. Enroll in a yoga class – or any type of class in which you have always wanted to participate. Create more adventure today – in a small, or big, way.
- Be Bold. Face your fear and take action to create the life you truly desire. Start doing this today. Get the support needed via a mentor or coach. You deserve support in your life and having it will save you a lot of time and energy. Make decisions instead of waiting for the right time and perfect conditions – end procrastination. Take yourself to the next level sooner, because you deserve it – NOW!
- LOVE Your Work. If you do not currently love what you do, it is time to get fully honest with yourself and take the steps to do the work you LOVE. Maybe you love your work, but there are elements of it that you don’t love – that’s okay – there is a way to align yourself to live in a space where 95% of the time you are doing what you love.
- Self-Care is How We Bold Women Roll. When we don’t take care of our need to feel GREAT, we are disempowered and exhausted. Get clear on what your particular needs are for self-care – morning, noon, and night – and put this into place starting TODAY. You will not only feel amazing, but you will also FR*EE yourself of feeling awful – for good!
- FUEL Your Body. Begin today to re-fuel with positive thoughts and gratitude, along with clean nutrition. Simply put, when we eat crap, we feel like crap – leaving us vulnerable to guilt and regret. When the body is fueled with too much sugar, it creates chaos and anxiety, completely disconnecting us from our essential self. A poor diet, high in sugar, impairs our ability to think positively. Put in the good stuff and get great results. A guilt FR*EE diet is one more positive way to live life with no regrets!
I would love to hear from you – If you have special tips, which you successfully use to Live Life Guilt-FR*EE With No Regrets, please share them by posting a comment here on my blog.
5 Amazing Benefits of Masterminding!
June 13, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Mastermind Groups are a powerful venue for change and have been around for centuries. Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, studied the richest men of the early 1900’s and wrote this book as part of his research (if you haven’t read it already I highly recommend it). One of the common practices of all of the wealthy men he researched was that they participated in a Mastermind with other like-minded men. These Mastermind groups served the purpose of helping the participants solve problems and move forward in their goals, making them more wealthy and successful.
“Master Mind as coordination of knowledge and effort, in a spirit of harmony, between two or more people, for the attainment of a definite purpose,” is how Napoleon Hill describes the Mastermind idea he studied. “This form of cooperative alliance (the Mastermind) has been the basis of nearly every great fortune. Your understanding of this great truth may definitely determine your financial status.”
Today, women entrepreneurs are designing new models of the Mastermind – and the results are more powerful than ever before. Being a women entrepreneur and being a member of a high level Mastermind group, I’m huge believer in the Mastermind model (in addition to private coaching) because it connects me with like-minded, big vision people and has tripled my success as an entrepreneur. I get to offer my point of view to my Mastermind group, and I receive solutions from the most extraordinary people.
When we try to create a profitable business on our own, it’s too easy to get overwhelmed, frustrated, isolated and stuck. When entrepreneurs are in this place, they (maybe you can relate to this?) they often begin to think that maybe there is something wrong with them. But the real truth is there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. In fact, the real truth is that you have a profound message to share that will help people transform their lives. I know deep in your heart you long to get this message out in the world in a BIG WAY!
But what exactly is a Mastermind? And how do you know if it’s for you?
Below are five elements of a Mastermind group. This will give you an idea of how they work so you can decide whether or not you would like to form a Mastermind or join one.
1. A Mastermind allows you to see a much bigger vision for yourself and moves you forward allowing you to take much bigger leaps.
A Mastermind is about creating consistent forward momentum and helping you achieve your dreams and goals. A Mastermind group brings out the things that are within you that you cannot see for yourself.
Masterminds are different than support groups. Support groups are wonderful to heal from past trauma, but Masterminds are not about healing. Mastermind groups are about growing taking big leaps and being willing to live out your fullest potential and playing your biggest game.
People who try to form casual Masterminds often end up disappointed. Causal Masterminds are much different than a Mastermind group with strong coaching and high level teaching of mindset, systems and marketing.
All members have to hold that level of energy, commitment, desire and set an intention to keep that momentum. This is not always an easy task!
2. A Mastermind Group is about powerful shifts in your mindset. Complaining, excuse-making and whining are not options!
In a Mastermind, each person gets a “hot seat” to present her big vision for her business and life to the group. The person presents her goals, dreams, and challenges. Tears often happen, as she is releasing fearful energy that up to this point has kept her stuck and realizing the time is NOW to move forward.
Complaining, excuses-making, whining and the feelings of staying stuck quickly dissolve. You are not only heard and fully supported, you are also given you need to gain clarity and move forward. Mindsets are a huge part of the Mastermind.
3. A Mastermind Group is about growth and expansion out of your comfort zone.
Most people desire expansion and growth. People who join a Mastermind know in their gut without growth for their purpose and dreams they’ll die a slow death. When you take part in a Mastermind you will be expanded and stretched. This excites people because they know on the other side of their comfort zone is huge growth. In fact, this is one of the biggest reasons people want to take part in a Mastermind! They know the results they have had from staying within their comfort zones and not satisfactory. Masterminds are very effective because they require you to expand out your comfort zone so you get the results you want (let’s get serious – helping more people, more money, more personal freedom and the business you love!).
4. A Mastermind Group offers support and holds you accountable.
For me personally, I am showing up for my life and business in a way I have never done before as a result of being part of a Mastermind. The results I am achieving are mind blowing! So much, in fact, I won the recent “Implementation Challenge” amongst my Mastermind group.
You see, creating a clear vision, having systems, and deciding and taking action are my strengths, and Masterminding has made these strengths even stronger (actually this is one reason why my clients love me as their coach. I move them from being stuck to achieving freedom through clarity, systems, deciding and action).
5. A Mastermind creates a huge space for new ideas, implementation, and resources. It’s a relationship of giving and receiving.
Each person is fully present and committed to supporting their Mastermind group. When each person gives their full focus and attention to one person and her dreams, brilliant ideas spark and solutions are offered. Challenges are no more – that is the power of the group. Resources and connections are often discovered in the process. This is just some of the tremendous value and benefit to taking part in a Mastermind.
There is something incredibly powerful about being amongst a group of Big Visionaries within the Mastermind.
Napoleon Hill put it this way: “No two minds ever come together without, thereby, creating a third, invisible, intangible force which may be likened to a third mind.”
The intention with the Mastermind group taps into a higher source of intelligence and creativity naturally guiding the group and moving it forward together. A greater awareness happens.
The awareness of this “third” mind helps me trust and access the knowing from within. Therefore, I am able to walk into fear and trust there is something bigger happening on the other side of fear.
Being part of a Mastermind is the greatest gift I could have ever given my business. It was an investment and risk I knew I had to take if I ever wanted to grow my business to a point where I could help more women and produce a larger income. Without risk, there is no reward.
The Top 7 Things That Hold Women Back From Taking The Big Leap
May 29, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
Do you have a big vision for your life and lots of ideas that you would like act upon, but your stuck in rut wondering when life will shift for once and for all?
I have the honor of coaching some of the most amazing women on this planet. What I have realized is that most women have a few things in common: They are brilliant, desire a really succulent life, have a really big vision (that often scares them right out of their panties), and have AMAZING ideas. However, these same women are almost always fearful, unsure and full of self-doubt. Their ideas never really get implemented because they are stuck, overwhelmed, frustrated and unclear. I really relate to this because I used to be the same exact way!
All of these brilliant women have a strong desire to make a difference in this lifetime. They want to leave a legacy behind and help others by doing what they love. What is really interesting is when one of my clients gets really clear and connects to her heart’s desire, she becomes aware that if she were living her desire FULLY, she would be so happy, unstoppable, fearless and feel a complete sense of freedom. Can you resonate with this?
If we have brilliant ideas and heart-felt desires, why do we struggle with creating a life on purpose? Where’s the disconnect? I am giving you the Top 7 things that Hold Women Back from Taking the Big Leap: Indecision, Procrastination, Self Doubt, Worry, Fear, Waiting and Negative Body Image.
Here’s the deal: These 7 things are very easy to overcome with the right mindset and support. This is easier than you think, though it may not presently feel this way.
Below are the top 7 Things that Hold Women Back from Taking the Big Leap. Read through them to see where you may stopping yourself then commit to live your purpose FULL OUT NOW. If you need support, for heaven’s sake, just allow yourself to have it! The only person holding you back is you. What’s perfect about this is you can change it by doing the exact thing your soul keeps telling you to do. It’s the very thing you keep ignoring.
1. Indecision:
Indecision means putting off making decisions or not making a decision at all. Successful women reach decisions promptly and hardly change them, if at all, slowly. They have deep trust and feel confident they change course at any given time.
Making quick decisions will liberate you.
People who are stuck and aren’t living the life they truly want are wishy-washy and change their mind frequently. They say yes/no/maybe over and over again. Ultimately they never come to any decision, so their life does not change – which leads to number two (see below).
2. Procrastination:
Which we all know procrastination is putting off what needed to be done yesterday until tomorrow. Your life is now and is waiting for you to fully show up in the present moment.
Get to understand and become aware of why you are procrastinating, instead of being unconscious to this behavior.
If you have a big dream, but you procrastinate, there is huge incongruency. It is worth your time to invest and understand why you are putting off the exact things you say you desire. Please stop fooling yourself that you will do it tomorrow. Tomorrow never happens. You have today to LIVE FULLY. Make it count!
3. Self Doubt:
Self doubt is a big cover up! It shows up in the form of feeling blah, making excuses or justifications for the reason why it won’t work out right now. It is disguised as envy, jealously, and criticizing yourself or others.
Waiting for the perfect time or perfect whatever (body size or right amount of money) to commit to something is really just you doubting your abilities.
If you are filled with self doubt, you need more clarity. You will also benefit with the support of another to champion you and help you develop the self confidence you need. When you end self doubt, you can move forward and take action on your dreams.
There is no need to doubt yourself. If your mind can conceive it, then you absolutely can achieve it!
4. Worry;
Worry is one the biggest forms of distraction I know. It takes you out of the present moment and takes you into the future – the unknown – which is scary for most. However, in my experience the future is filled with wonder and delight. This is achieved by letting go of worry and getting present with your self, your life and dreams.
Worry is a form of fear and is just an illusion about something that may happen in the future. It a form of “trying” to control an outcome.
What if you let go of worry and allowed something amazing to happen?
5. Fear:
Fear is not real (period). It is an illusion created in the mind by the ego. The ego’s primary role is keeping you from growing and expanding. It wants to keep you small, but you were born to big.
6. Waiting – What the heck are you waiting for?
You want it now – right? So why are you waiting to go for it? Get clear about this.
Most often – women wait for the right time, the right amount of money, etc. I learned how to completely love myself through choosing not to wait – to go after what I want – especially when things aren’t perfect. Waiting is stagnant energy that only creates more stagnant energy – it shows up in painful thoughts, self-sabotage, emotional eating, etc. – fueling more fire to any belief that you can’t do it. And honestly, waiting does not feel good. When you decide and take action NOW it fuels fire to the belief that you have everything you need to rock your life and body!
7. Negative Body Image:
Last week I spoke with a woman who shared her struggle of her own body image. She told me she often isolates in her house. When it comes to going out to events, she gets nervous about who will be there and how they will judge her, and this often stops her from going – or if she does go she immediately starts comparing herself to other women.
Body image and self-perception matter deeply when we give them the power to alter our behavior in a way that does not feel good. In our personal and professional lives, a negative body image blocks us from having more deeper intimacy, wonderful experiences, making more money – it just plain stops us from creating the ultimate life, health, body, and even financial status, we deeply desire.
Love and fear can’t exist at the same time.
Successful women have big fears but they understand what fear is and what it is not. They face their fear and do it anyway. They connect to self -love and value, belief, trust, and faith. Developing self confidence diminishes fear so you can move forward and create your life on your terms.
Please do yourself a big, big favor and commit to move beyond these 7 things that keep you stuck. Stop waiting for the perfect time, let go of the need for complete certainty, the fear of scarcity, the struggle with your body weight and waiting for the right amount of money. If you don’t, you will be waiting a long, long time. Your time to shine is NOW!
Please share with me how you will allow yourself to shine by posting your comments here on my blog!
28 Ways to Rock Your Own World!
April 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career - Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15.Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
4 Tips to Keep Your Dreams Moving Forward
January 17, 2012 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
I know sometimes we just feel like giving up! It seems like we are not making progress as we had hoped for the New Year and often it feels like “making progress” is taking forever. When we reach this point, we start to question if we made the right decision (or even if there is something wrong with us) and maybe that is why we are not as successful as everyone else seems to be. You may find yourself working so hard – and the results are nowhere in sight.
I want to reassure you, if you feel this way; – you are exactly where you are supposed to be! The very important thing to remember is “Now is not the time to give up!”
Often when we are working too hard, and pushing too much not seeing the results we desire – we become exhausted and begin to question ourselves – and we simply feel like giving up.
But now is not the time to give up! You have come way too far and to turn back now! Below are four simple tips that will help you create forward momentum, much better results, increase your level of happiness and put the bounce back into your step!
1. Give Yourself Permission
One reason that we get stuck, overwhelmed, and frustrated is because we suffer burn out and fatigue from trying so hard. I have a private client who has doubled her success by practicing my coaching instruction to simply give herself permission to rest and stop pushing. If you are like me, you want results yesterday! However, I have learned (and coach many women) to slow down when struggle sets in. Don’t push.
When we are pushing and tired our reality gets distorted. Instead of pushing and beating yourself up for what you have not yet accomplished, give yourself permission to take a break when you’re tired and everything feels like you’re going against the current. Fatigue is one of the number one causes for burnout. It causes second-guessing of oneself — one of the biggest reasons people quit! When you feel like you are spinning your wheels – allow yourself to step away – regain clarity – and get your prospective back. By allowing yourself to rest and connect with joy, you’ll be happier and more successful. Creativity flows and you will be more productive. Commit today to giving yourself permission to rest.
2. Let Go
When we are pushing rather than in an effortless flow – we just need to let go. When you become blocked and stuck, it’s time to check in with how attached you are to the outcome. You will know when you are really attached to the outcome because you will feel exhausted and ready to give up.
I have seen private clients attract more clients, land speaking gigs, land a great job, and find the perfect match – just by releasing their attachment to the outcome. Once you let go, you will find yourself being more resourceful, thinking out of the box, and seeing new opportunities. Your happiness level will sky rocket and you will achieve the exact results you desire – if not better.
3. Push Through the Dip
You may feel like you have hit a low, but really it’s the transformational point leading you to success. You may feel like giving up even though you’re doing all the right things. You are doing all the right things – just not seeing the results. Seth Godin wrote an amazing book called “The Dip” — the plateau that separates the average from the best in the world. Knowing what to do when you hit the dip is so important. If you have hit the dip and you can honestly say that going forward is the best decision, then you continue to move boldly ahead until you reach the other side. It might feel like the hardest you have ever worked, but once you make it, the results will be tremendous.
4. Give Yourself the Gift of Support
Support and (accountability) is everything! Sometimes, we can’t see our own blind spots and this often slows us way down, frustrates us, and we end up working even harder. When you are doing things in your life and business that you have never done before, having support makes all the difference in the world!
Working with a coach will not only support you and give you accountability, it will push you out of your comfort zone. All my private clients are so amazed that prior to investing in coaching with me, they thought they either didn’t really need a coach – or felt guilty about choosing to invest in coaching. Now, after being coached they are committed to always having this type of support in their life. Why? Because, left to our own devices we don’t do what we should or could. When we work with a coach, we make more progress and do it more rapidly. I personally know this – not just from coaching hundreds of women – but from investing in myself and having MY OWN private coach.
7 Ways to Better Your Life
November 29, 2011 by Karen Fagan · 4 Comments
When it comes to making changes to bettering our life, the first thing that you may ask yourself is where to begin. I have 7 brilliant and easy ways to better your life starting today. As you read through start with the ones that most resonate with you.
- Trust Your Intuition: Imagine your life if you fully tapped into your intuition. Our intuition is one of most powerful resources we own. Listening to our intuition is the essence of creativity, the foundation for intentional living, and the source of all our best answers and decisions. Intuition is that hunch you have, your gut feeling or as I refer to it, my “knowing.” Connecting and listening to your intuition is a skill to master. For some people, trusting intuition is hard to do. I recommend you start by allowing yourself the experience of listening to your intuition. Even if you’re unsure, listen to your knowing and begin to trust. Listening to your intuition is key in making decisions because you already have the best answer inside you. By listening to your intuition you access exactly what you need to know and is the best knowledge source for any life or business decision.
- Show Up in Your Life: Do you expend more energy avoiding your life rather than showing up in it? Is more time spent telling yourself you will do it tomorrow, wasting hours away on Facebook, or watching television instead of being present to your life’s vision? It’s time for that to change. Begin showing up in your life — in small big ways, it doesn’t matter; the point is to show up. Show up imperfectly; be exactly who you are right now. Agree to stop tricking yourself into thinking you will show up later – once you’ve come up with the perfect way to do it, the best idea or the ideal opportunity. The best of everything comes after you decide to show up. When you show up in your life, you build a deep sense of self-confidence and which allows you to play a bigger role in your life.
- Learn to Receive: Women are masters at giving but have a difficult time receiving. We often don’t fully receive what is given to us. Open yourself to fully accept what others offer to you; you deserve it. Accept compliments, gifts, and help when others extend them to you. All you have to do is say, “Thank you.” When you begin to receive you experience life and people in a more meaningful way.
- Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: Stepping out of your comfort zone can be unpleasant or scary, but staying in a place where we feel at ease doesn’t help us make the changes we desire or take our lives to the next level. Make an agreement with yourself to find a way to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Today, do one thing you’ve wanted to do but haven’t yet because you feel uncomfortable doing so. Through the process of doing this you will find out you have much more to offer yourself and the world.
- Take More Action: Inaction does not result in fulfillment. Get out of your head and into your life by taking action. Instead of waiting for some big push or inspiration to hit, decide to take action right now. If you have a sense your life would benefit from taking a class, or working with a coach sign up. If you been thinking about writing that book, starting drawing or getting back to an exercise regimen, stop thinking and take action. Write your outline, enroll in that class, get your art supplies, put your sneakers on and take that walk. Take action.
- Break out of Captivity: Say no to old rules that hold you back and create new ones of your own. Let go of outdated self-images and beliefs that no longer support you and where you are going. Stop worrying about what everyone else will think, turn off your inner critic and follow your heart.
- Embrace Life’s Lessons: Don’t worry about making mistakes. When you concern yourself with thoughts of failure, you hinder yourself from making any progress. Concerning yourself with how you might not succeed keeps you from taking action to move forward. The more you worry about making mistakes the more stagnant you become. Begin to trust that every mistake you make is the perfect opportunity to learn and grow. Embrace the lessons you’ll learn from the blunders and errors you might make rather than allowing these fears to hinder your progress. Don’t beat yourself up about how you might not be perfect; celebrate the fact that you are taking charge of your life and taking action toward your goals!
The best thing about your life is you get to decide, how and when you want to change it. Putting one or all of these tips into practice will getting you moving and I guarantee you’ll find that you are more self-confident and feel more in control of your life and your destiny.
How to Rock Your Life Out Authentically
September 6, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 3 Comments
Taking the time to get to know your wants and desires can take many women years and years. Do you have difficulty allowing yourself to become your true self? Programs like my Rock Your Body, Soul and Finances Program really allow you to stretch yourself to your limits, find your dreams and desires to become a strong and beautiful woman. By becoming this woman that is hiding inside of you, you can free your body, mind and spirit and get the control back into your life that has been hidden or is missing. By simply opening yourself up to the process you are allowing yourself to be free of the ties that bind and hold you back. Let’s get out from behind the rock, open up and be who you are meant to be!
There was a time in my life I was really disconnected to my own self. I didn’t even know what I liked, what pleased me, not to mention, what I wanted to do with my precious life. But the one thing I did know, I was not living the life I desired. I felt this in my soul. It’s not something I had to know – it was a feeling deep down inside me.
Once I figured out who I was as a woman, I was so afraid to reveal this to the world. I was afraid to dress the way I truly wanted, even as far as being afraid to wear too big of earrings in case people talked about me. I was afraid to tell people that, once, I really wanted to take my own life. I was afraid to eat super healthy food in front of people who weren’t eating the same way or who were unhealthy themselves. I thought people will think I am crazy; too much – too demanding – too into living a higher quality life.
So, I just kept myself a very small version of me in hopes I wouldn’t rock the boat. In order to not get people mad, I kept myself safe and small so others would like me and wouldn’t judge me for living a happy and healthy life.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
Many of my private clients used to be scared silly to express who they are as a woman and what their place is in this world. They stay quiet; stay in the wrong place in their lives or careers; carry extra weight and have depleted energy and bank accounts. Sound familiar?
Take an honest look at what your life is right now. When it comes to your body, your relationships, your personal life, your career – Are you a woman who is rocking it authentically, or are you hiding behind the rock? Playing small, playing safe and hiding behind a rock – doesn’t work EVER! I know!!
I lived behind the rock for a long time. Why? Because nothing was ever allowed to feel good … I never allowed myself the pleasure of a job well done; the pleasure of living a good and healthy life; of having quality relationships. Living behind the rock keeps you completely out of alignment with who you really are; who you are meant to be and it will never bring you any closer to your heart desires.
How do you step into who you really are as a women and be who you are meant to be?
Take a look at this list and see what you can change and start working on today.
Women Who Rock Out Life Authentically …
1. Never apologizes for who she is, what she wears, what she desires and for what she does or what she doesn’t like.
2. Says what she means even if it pisses people off.
3. Lives her life with compassion but doesn’t sacrifice her happiness for others.
4. Has very clear boundaries
5. Is very clear with when she says YES and when she says NO
6. Lives free from guilt, self-criticism, and gossip
7. Asks for what she needs – without hesitation.
8. Brings her best self forward even when she doesn’t feel like it.
9. Knows that if she is at a restaurant and her meal comes not to her standard, she can graciously ask for it to be returned, corrected or ask for something else – without feeling like she’s been needy or a b%$#@.
10. Knows how to please herself and knows how to ask others to please her.
11. Is surrounded by friends that support and challenge her to be her best.
12. Wears larger than life earrings when she feels like (My private clients did this – it felt so good to her to wear what she truly desired)
13. Rests and replenishes because she craves it.
14. Makes decisions without the need to justify them.
15. Knows when she indulges in spa treatments or shopping, she doesn’t have to hide it from her loved ones.
16. Spends quality time with her children and loved ones, free from distraction.
17. Thrives on contribution.
18. Knows exactly when she needs rest.
19. Flosses her teeth, feeds her body with high quality food.
20. Seeks all things wonderful.
21. Doesn’t waste time in drama and chaos
22. Has decided to no longer waste time with body image issue; rather set her life up to love her body and support it.
23. Invests in herself and life without hesitation or guilt.
24. Continuously adds more color in to her life.
25. Allows herself to connect to her sensual energy as women.
26. Lives in love not in fear.
27. No longer pretends everything is o.k. when it’s not. She stopped pretending and telling herself it will get better. She finally gives herself the gift of a powerful coach.
28. Allows dreams; she is curious; she desires the best for herself, family, animals and community
So tell me… how will you authentically start Rocking Your Life Out? Start today by posting your comments on how you will start. I would love to hear them!! Together we can do this!
Own Your Irresistibility!
August 23, 2011 by Karen Fagen · Leave A Comment
One very sure way to feel amazing and create a life you love is to Own Your Irresistibility! Claiming your irresistibility is the key to fulfilling your potential as a woman and human being. Irresistibility is freedom to the soul!
You ARE meant to feel amazing and make an impact in this world.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible women: women who are willing to be bold, fully alive, enthusiastic, and expressive – regardless of the circumstance. Women who are not afraid to tell their truth and use their voice for what they believe. Women that honor their dreams, desires, bodies – and who are courageous and contribute their ideas.
Do You Wonder If You Are Irresistible?
Your irresistibility isn’t something you have to go out and get. It’s already inside of you waiting to come FULLY ALIVE.
I want to share the key to claiming your irresistibility. Your ability to fully own your irresistibility lies in the Present Moment. That is it.
When you are fully present, you have complete access to your highest self: the most creative, resourceful, brilliant, and gorgeous part of you. What is more irresistible than this? Nothing.
Being present means you stop going on mental vacations. Being present means being free from distraction, drama, and instead, releasing all negative self-image and chaos.
When you are present in the moment, you stop thinking you aren’t good enough or don’t have enough. Rather, you fully and actively engage your mind, body and soul within whatever it is you are doing in that present moment. You choose to see yourself as brilliant and beautiful – no matter what has happened in the past!
You release those thoughts about the past that keep you captive and keep you obsessively worrying about your future. You bring your focus into the here and now.
Please bring your undivided attention to this moment and fully absorb what I am about to share with you. Emerge yourself in this golden morsel of wisdom.
The world needs you.
Your irresistibility is the greatest gift you can choose for yourself and share with the world. When you step into all that makes you irresistible – you feel amazing and your decision, choices and actions are much more empowered – than when you are not owing it.
Your irresistibility is feeling from within – in the present moment…here and now…FREE of mental chatter. Full of self-love and positive self-talk.
You have a very powerful mind and maybe you are thinking, “Who am I – to do what I really want to do?”
Please hear this: You are not your thoughts. However, you are the magnificent one behind them. You are more than enough: wise, glorious, and very capable of doing that which your heart yearns to do.
You are perfect in this very present moment. No other moment matters.
You deserve to live in the biggest and boldest version of you.
Irresistibility is a expansive feeling within your soul and body – a sensation and taste of succulence. Complete freedom of judgement or self-criticism.
There is nothing else you need – except to fully step into your personal power and embrace all your unique talents…Free of self-doubt.
When you do this, you will find yourself completely comfortable in your own skin, simply irresistible to others, connected to your abundance, surrounded by amazing people, expanding your career and business – and opportunities will flow in like you wouldn’t believe!
Irresistibility Action Challenge:
1. Name three things you really appreciate about you.
2. List three ways you are already Irresistible.
3. Bring your awareness to the present moment of acknowledging these things you just wrote about you – and fully breathe it in.
Do you feel yourself lighten up? Most of us take ourselves too seriously, not seeing who we really are and what we are fully capable.
Remember, a very sure way to create a life you love is to Own Your Irresistibility! Claiming your irresistibility is the key to fulfilling your potential as a woman and human being.
You ARE meant to make an impact in this world.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible women: women who are willing to be bold, fully alive, enthusiastic, and expressive – regardless of the circumstances. Women who are not afraid to tell their truth and use their voice for what they believe. Women that honor their dreams and desires, and that are courageous and contribute their ideas.
Stop Wondering If You Are Irresistible – and OWN That You ARE!
Surrender to your inner greatness and be present to fully accepting it. Let go of resistance it never-ever serves your best.
I would love to hear your answers to this week’s Irresistibility Action Challenge.
16 Powerful Ways to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin
August 9, 2011 by Karen Fagen · 2 Comments
I have coached hundreds of women over the years that have struggled – or are currently struggling and in pain with body image issues – feeling uncomfortable in their body. The truth is, they are not living the life they really want to live. It’s really holding them back from living a life with passion blocking them from going after what they want and keeping it!
I completely feel their pain. I really understand it, as I hid for many years behind my body image issues that left me feeling so uncomfortable in my own skin.
It took me a long, long time to fully understand that the struggle with my body image was keeping me from growing and expanding my entire life. I realized, in the process of struggling with my body image issues, I was just distracted in the un-truth and disconnected from my personal power.
If I had been connected to my truth and personal power, I would not have been critical of myself and my body at all. I would have honored myself and only noticed my beauty and wonder. I would have taken action like nobodys business to create my most yummy life.
Instead, I stayed in pain and missed opportunities for fun, love, and adventure.
My BIG turning point was when I realized my body images issues were nothing but a BIG DISTRACTION keeping me in hiding, preventing me from taking risk and living the life I really wanted to live. My body image issues thoughts, feelings, and actions –were creating the exact things I didn’t want in my life.
I deeply began to understand that obsessing about my body was a big decoy, because what I was really afraid of were the following:
- Not being enough
- Failing
- Not measuring up
- My ability to receive love
- My life change… and so on, and so on.
I NOW know how to live a life Free from struggling with body image issues, and I want to help you find this Freedom, too. Its very empowering and life changing to feel vibrant and amazing in your skin.
I learned a huge reason why we struggle. Struggling only keeps us in the same place. Struggling keeps us from expanding our life, health and business. Body image issues constrict us (at every level) and deplete and drain us, and keep us imprisoned. It blocks true intimacy with life, keeping us from savoring or experiencing it fully.
When we obsess about our body, it is a huge indication that something is out of alignment within our heart, mind and life. It shows us we are disconnected from our truth and personal power and are hiding from what we are really afraid of.
Many women I have worked with have struggled with their body image. It breaks my heart, because I know these women really desire a full and bodacious life with complete emotional and financial Fr*eedom.
Body image issues are a big distraction, keeping you confined from taking action and fully creating the life you want. Think about this for a moment – Who would you be and what would do if you werent struggling with body image issues? Would you be confident, happy, blissful, and really successful?
Here are ways to Free yourself and move away from body image issues and into full Fr*eedom. Where you love your body, have sweet love for you and allow much bigger success to come to you:
1. Your body is completely beautiful allow yourself to own this and stop denying it. It may not be where you want it to be, but you have the power to change this. For now, see your beauty.
2. Your body is brilliant and takes care of all things for you. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it and listen to it.
3. Create a list of all the wonderful things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often. Example: I love my legs because they take me great places and I get to see so many wonderful places with them.
4. Make peace and be Free. Your body is a beautiful vessel that carries your soul.
5. When you obsess about your body image, ask yourself this question: “What is it that I really want in my life that I do not yet have and why am I holding myself back?”
6. Visualize feeling amazing in your body and skin. Fully connect to it. This will instantly empower you to make better choices for you.
7. Re-focus on something that you really love about your body (you will find it if you are willing to look with love). If love seems too much – then start with what you like.
8. Reflect on all the things you really want to accomplish in your life and business. Realize that if you shift your focus away from negative thoughts about your body, you’ll move into beautiful thoughts of achieving your true dreams and desires. This shift will instantly make you feel better and motivate you to take action to go after what you want.
9. Make a list of the things you have put off due to body image issues, then go and take action on one item. Notice how fantastic this feels.
10. Write a Sacred Contract letter to your body with your commitment for honoring it starting today and include a thank you for all its wonder and beauty.
11. Rest and nourish your body like royalty. Rest, replenish, stretch, massage, hydrate, and moisturize it. Stop pushing so hard rest.
12. Exercise because it makes you feel better, connects you with your personal power, and makes your body healthy, strong, and shapely.
13. Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your body and connect to this feeling again. You will take inspired action from this feeling state.
14. Write a list of at least 10 positive things about yourself and add to this list daily.
15. When you find yourself being harsh on your body, get curious and find out what you’re really afraid of.
16. Please, release attachment to the way your body used to be. Meet yourself where you are today – so you can be Free of struggle and this will empower you to take the action you need for the changes you desire.
Doing even one of these action items will shift your energy, have you feeling much better in your own skin, connect you with your beautiful body, and move you into a place that allows more abundance in your life.
